How you can control your anger?
Anger
management:
How
you can control your anger?
How to get your anger under
control?
1.
Think before you speak
In the heat of the moment,
it's easy to say something you'll later regret. Take a few moments to collect
your thoughts before saying anything — and allow others involved in the
situation to do the same.
2.
Once you're calm, express your anger
As soon as you're thinking
clearly, express your frustration in an assertive but no confrontational way.
State your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or
trying to control them.
3.
Get some exercise
Physical activity can help
reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. If you feel your anger
escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other
enjoyable physical activities.
4.
Take a timeout
Timeouts aren't just for
kids. Give yourself short breaks during times of the day that tend to be
stressful. A few moments of quiet time might help you feel better prepared to
handle what's ahead without getting irritated or angry.
5.
Identify possible solutions
Instead of focusing on what
made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand. Does your child's messy room
drive you crazy? Close the door. Is your partner late for dinner every night?
Schedule meals later in the evening — or agree to eat on your own a few times a
week. Remind yourself that anger won't fix anything and might only make it
worse.
6. Stick with 'I' statements
To avoid criticizing or placing blame — which might only
increase tension — use "I" statements to describe the problem. Be
respectful and specific. For example, say, "I'm upset that you left the
table without offering to help with the dishes" instead of "You never
do any housework."
7. Don't
hold a grudge
Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and
other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself
swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you can
forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the situation and
strengthen your relationship.
8. Use
humor to release tension
Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Use humor to help
you face what's making you angry and, possibly, any unrealistic expectations
you have for how things should go. Avoid sarcasm, though — it can hurt feelings
and make things worse.
9.
Practice relaxation skills
When your temper flares, put relaxation skills to work.
Practice deep-breathing exercises, imagine a relaxing scene, or repeat a
calming word or phrase, such as "Take it easy." You might also listen
to music, write in a journal or do a few yoga poses — whatever it takes to
encourage relaxation.
10. Know
when to seek help
Learning to control anger is a challenge for everyone at
times. Seek help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control, causes
you to do things you regret or hurts those around you.
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